STOP Keeping Score! The Silent Killer of Connection

Dear Marriage Investors,

In this week’s YouTube podcast, we tackled a hard truth many couples face but few want to admit: scorekeeping is silently sabotaging your connection.

Keeping score—mentally tracking your spouse’s mistakes, failures, or how many times you gave more than they did—creates a toxic cycle of resentment, comparison, and emotional distance. It might feel justified in the moment, but in the long run, it chips away at intimacy.

What Does the Bible Say?

In 1 Corinthians 13:5, Scripture tells us that “love keeps no record of wrongs.” That’s not just a poetic phrase—it’s a clear warning. Real love, God’s love, doesn’t keep tally marks. It forgives. It lets go. It resets.

Scorekeeping says: “You owe me.”
But love says: “I’m here for us.”

When we stop keeping score, we create space for grace, growth, and genuine reconciliation.

What Happens When We Let It Go

During this week’s podcast, we opened up about times in our own marriage where unspoken scorecards almost caused disconnection. We shared how easy it is to build quiet resentment—even over the small things—and how healing it is when you finally drop the scoreboard.

Instead of counting what your spouse got wrong, what if you started noticing what they’re doing right?
What if you stopped waiting for them to "catch up" and chose to love without conditions?

Marriage isn’t about winning—it’s about unity. When we compete, we divide. But when we cover each other in grace, we draw closer.

Final Encouragement

Let today be the day you stop keeping score.

Rip up the imaginary ledger.

Offer grace instead of grudges.

Choose forgiveness over fairness.

📘 Want help building a marriage that reflects grace and connection? Our book, Forever Together: Unveiling the Keys to Lasting Marriage Connection, is available now on Amazon and Barnes & Noble. It’s a powerful resource to help couples drop the scoreboard and rediscover real love.

Until next time—invest in grace, not grudges. And stay forever together.

With honesty and hope,
Marcellus & Valerie
Marriage Investors
www.marriageinvestors.net